Skip to main content

Some Wintry Reminiscence

It was almost ten years since we’d spoken. You left so quickly that we’d made promises about circumstances under which you’d come back to me that, perhaps, we both knew neither of us could keep, though I didn’t allow myself those thoughts. Not then, anyway. I didn’t realize how much of an impression you’d made on me. In your curlicued handwriting, you’d written down you address for me to write to you. I kept that scrap of paper in my wallet for just over two years. In that time I wrote three letters and was too much of a coward to send any of them.

I thought about you a lot, but my memory of you began to fade after I met someone else, but never completely. As Mr. Bernstein explained, you were my girl with the white parasol. Who knew if you’d ever remember me, but I would bet there hasn’t been a month that has gone by in all that time when I haven’t thought of you.


The rest of this story is available in the collection "Cupid Painted Blind" available on Amazon for the Kindle.

Comments

Norm said…
I liked it, perhaps because it reminded me of something I wrote awhile back.

http://www.mostlyanecdotal.org/2006/12/24/sweet-and-shy/
11:19 PM
Anonymous said…
I like ur stories...care to exchange link? rika-shortstories.blogspot.com
2:08 AM
Anonymous said…
It is a good story. A few bits of dialogue would make it great.
11:28 PM
Unknown said…
Norm,

I liked your story... I guess that sort of experience is far more common than maybe I thought it might be when I thought it up and wrote it...

Parvaz,

You might be write, but I was trying to write it as though it was a letter to the girl he'd never send... If you take my meaning... I promise the next one will have some dialogue.
11:20 PM
Unknown said…
right.... you might be right... not write...

man it's late.
11:21 PM
Norm said…
All the stories have been told. The only difference is in how they're told. We take our own experience and imagination, throw them in the mix, and hope our words add something to what it is be human.
11:36 PM
Unknown said…
I can get behind that.
11:43 PM
Unknown said…
A nice story though a little surprise or boom at the ending could have added a zing to it. But very realistic and gets the reader involved, that's a great thing...
3:42 AM
Unknown said…
My daughter favorite link is http://www.kidsfront.com for short stories, I will put forward your blog also.
2:47 AM
Unknown said…
Hi Bryan,

I enjoyed reading this realistic short story. I also found another good short story on http://www.shortstorybook.net
Do check it.....regards, karen
5:03 AM
Anna Russell said…
"When my self-conscious had given your image a rest for any extended period of time, my sub-conscious would remind me of you."

Love, love, love that line. It says so much in so few words - something I think all good writers should be able to do.

Sorry to be pedantic, but I think you might have meant to say "eyes" after almond?

I read someone commented on not being so keen on the ending, but I disagree - this story is written in such a realistic manner that any other ending would have spoiled it imo.

Nicely done.

And by the way - NEVER ask a girl if you can kiss her. Never!

Hugs
Anna xxx
2:16 PM
Unknown said…
Anna,

Thanks for the save on the eyes... It was certainly meant to be there...

And yes, I've learned you never ask a girl if you can kiss her.

Thanks for reading...

--Bryan
2:23 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Anatomy of a Scene: The Third Man

It's time again to break down a classic scene. One that's well-written and, in my view, a fine example of excellent craft.

I've done some of these articles from books (like The End of the Affairand Starship Troopers) and other movies (like Citizen Kane, City Lights, Raiders of the Lost Ark, and Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid), but now it's time to take a look at a scene from The Third Man. It blends the best of Orson Welles (as he's in the film and drives this scene) and Graham Greene, who wrote this particular screenplay.

Before we get to the scene, we need some context.

The Third Man is a tale of the black market in Vienna, just after World War II. It's about a cheap, dime-store Western novelist named Holly Martins (played by Joseph Cotton) and his friend Harry Lime (Orson Welles.) Lime offered Martins a job in Vienna, so Martins leaves America and arrives, only to find that Harry Lime is dead. Penniless, without a friend or reason to be in the country, h…
Post a Comment
Read more

Anatomy of a Scene - City Lights

We're going to break down another scene this week, and it's one of my favorites in cinema history. It comes from the ending of City Lights by Charlie Chaplin, which I think is the greatest romantic comedy ever made. 
It's a touching film from 1931 and I would make it mandatory viewing for anyone who wants to learn to tell a story.
The scene we're going to be breaking down comes from the very end of the film, so if you haven't seen it, I don't want to spoil it for you. Go watch the film. You can rent it for $3.99 in HD on Amazon or for free on Hulu with a free trial or plus subscription. You should just buy the Blu-ray, though. You're going to want to revisit it.
For those of you familiar with the movie, or for those of you who are going to ignore my pleas to watch it and go ahead with this post anyway, I'm going to set this clip up a bit before you watch it.
City Lights tells the story of Chaplin's Tramp and how he falls in love with a blind flower …
Post a Comment
Read more

50+ Rules and Tips About Writing I've Collected Over the Years

I have twenty or thirty notebooks and journals filled up with snippets about writing, my plans for stories, bits of dialogue, interesting ideas, plotlines, scraps of short stories, and a dozen other things. I carry one with me at all times and it takes me a couple of months to fill one up.

One of the things I've kept in one of my notebooks was a collection of writing tips and rules that I've collected over the years in my travels. From teachers, from books, from wherever. Most of my career has been spent screenwriting, so a lot of these are most applicable to that, but I wanted to present them so they might be of use to you as well.

I've never stopped collecting these over the years and I never will.

To start the list are Kurt Vonnegut's eight rules of writing. They are the first in my notebook and, I think, the most useful. I'll add a star to those I think are applicable most to screenwriting. Some of these aren't applicable to everyone in every situation, but…
3 comments
Read more